please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
