That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
