Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
