You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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