if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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