also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
i think i have herpe
just one?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
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