Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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