Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
