Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
