it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
i barfeds in our rink
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
