It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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