i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Can you bring me the toilet please
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Randomize
