Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
i think my cat just said my name.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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