My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I wannas sexs uuuuu
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
I'm passing your future prison.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Randomize
