There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize
