at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Randomize
