office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize