dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize
