I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize