It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize