Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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