I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Found your dick twin last night
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Randomize
