Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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