how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
