apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
