Grow some girl-balls and come out already
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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