bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Randomize
