Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
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