We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
