we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Two words: nipple clamps
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