This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
