he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize