today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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