Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
where are my eyebrows?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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