Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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