My nipple is on Facebook.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize