Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize
