dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
