Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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