Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
