The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
