Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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