Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
