What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
pop tarts are not kleenex
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
