You smell like stripper and shame
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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