Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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