You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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