If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
