I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
