Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
