girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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