please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I enjoy the company of your penis
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
