I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
