last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
